Sex and the city is back in my life again and I am loving it!
I am doing a rerun of seasons and I am currently at the end of season 2, it has got me thinking where my life is now from the first time watching it at home with my parents and the second time living as a single woman with my sister in our early 20s.
I loved satc and could watch it over and over but I find it interesting how you feel differently towards it at different stages in your life, the first time I watched it, it was all about the fashion, the second I was team Aiden but now I am older and wiser I am definitely all for team Big. It is real, raw and not the fairytale happy end we dream of when we were younger…..
So which SATC lead female are you?
I would LOVE to be Samantha but I think I am probably most like Carrie, I also am lucky enough to have my own Mr Big! People tell me how lucky I am with my husband, and I really truly am but people also dont know the journey to where we all are today so they?
So I will start with fashion on this post, all about the labels now and less about Love 💘
I will also look at Carrie’s outfits, the thing I love about Patricia Field who styled the character’s is how she portrayed the emotions, moments and love through fashion!
Let’s start with Carries hair! When she is truly herself it is wild and curly, only straightening it to be a perfect version of herself, I think we are all guilty of this….. Reinventing yourself in the search for happiness, either weightloss, New hair or clothes in the hope you will feel complete.
Blonde or brunette?
Carrie is definitely a blonde, she dyed it brown when she got stood up at the altar and this thankfully did not last before she returned to what was suited best.
Now for shoes…….
Carrie had some real beautiful shoes and that is all I need to say on the matter.
And finally at the role old age of 34 I own my very own pair of vintage Dior Gladiator Heels!!!!!!
Not the I could favourites when you think of SATC it I love love love these heels, and I don’t think I could pull off odd coloured heels or furry shoes nowadays I will leave that in my fond memories of when I watched SATC the 2nd time round…….
Next time I will be pondering about the fashion and stories of the other characters in Sex and the City
Can you believe it has been 3 years since I last wrote on my blog?
I wanted to recap in this one and start a fresh on writing as i am quite different now, in a different place physically and mentally!
When I started in 2015 I had just had a baby and was trying to recover from a very traumatic labour and birth, this thankfully is a long distant memory now. I am at peace now and realize that a large proportion of people do not get the Labour they dreamed of!
I was on a weight loss journey and I dont think this will ever stop!
I went from 14.5 stone down to 11.9 in 2016 maintained 12stone for a few years and currently sitting at 13.7, I would like to lose some weight and will start this in September once life gets back to some kind of routine….
Covid happened and I won’t even go into that! Let’s just say nothing can challenge me any more than 2020 did!
So here I am a mum to a nearly 6 year old, in our new ‘forever home’ where I work most days now.
Plans for the blog for the remainder of 2020:
1. Holidays abroad and in the UK for young families
2. Beauty must-have items for the rare trip to the pub during 2020
3. Fashion bloopers through my 20s and 30s
4. The 10 top outfits in Sex and the City for all 4 leading ladies
5. Is the planet over populated?
6. Life hacks!
It’s been a while since my last post and I’ve been a busy full time working mum whilst maintaining 12-13 stone.
I had a target of 11 and then changed to a more realistic 12… managed to get to 12.3 and then i just got a bit lost thanks to Emetophobia….
I can cook and prepare beautiful meals but then they go in the bin because I’m convinced something in the meal will make my family and I poorly! It’s a mixture of Emetophobia and anxiety that has been consuming me this year and I hit a really dark place having to eat ready made meals, no nutritional value whatsoever and far too many convenient take aways but even they got to the point I was convinced we would be poorly.
My closest colleagues had noticed a change in me (being quiet, distant and binning far too many meals) and one of them kindly recommended a really good local Therapist who specialises in anxiety.
It took me a few weeks but I finally plucked up the courage and went to visit her, I was very dubious as I struggle to talk to family about it never mind a stranger and I’m just not into the typical “And how does that make you feel” therapy… so I got the courage and carried myself there with a slight hangover and did what I needed to do!
It was intense! I cried all the way through as she said all the things that had only ever been in my head and also some that I never even realised were true.
I went home and was pretty much numb all day and decided on a film night so watched Collateral Beauty, the end of this film touched a nerve and I was in floods of tears my husband knew something wasn’t right and I decided to open up about everything….
So it turns out I associate vomiting with terrible things even as serious as death, my nanna had an epileptic fit in the car when I was a child and my sister nearly died from pneumonia so both experiences were filled with vomiting and even vomiting blood and both I was under 6 years old…
This stayed with me and shortly after at a BBQ I remember someone hadn’t cooked the chicken drumsticks correctly and although no one had eaten any yet it stuck with me it would make you sick and there started the Emetophobia.
The anxiety was a result of my father passing away when I was 23 and the 2 head to head are just a disaster as both feed into each other making each problem much worse!
I have anxiety triggered from loss and now fear losing people and things and also a fear of vomit whether it’s me or someone else because in my head it’s much worse than it actually Is…
So I will continue with the therapy and have advised if she doesn’t feel it’s working she will put a stop to it and if it is I will need no more than 12 sessions!
She’s taught me my worst patterns I need to break in order to get better and I’m trying my hardest!
Her next job is to figure out what has kept the fears going?
I’ll keep you posted 😘
So…. I have maintained 12 stone for a year now trying to achieve my 11 stone target, I have finally accepted that I am meant to be as i am now. I am healthy with the odd treat now and again, I am a size 12/14 which is now under the UK average and although I am still classed as overweight I have accepted myself as I am.
I know we are never truly happy with ourselves but I am as happy as I ever will be, losing another stone will not make me happier, it will only limit my lifestyle and make me feel miserable.
I had got to the point in my weight loss ‘journey’ where I was a bit obsessed with the figures, photos and getting to target I forgot to enjoy myself as I am. I started obese at 14.5 stone with high blood pressure and now my blood pressure is normal and that was the reason i started this…. not to be skinny! I am a woman with curves and shape! I wear tight leggings and nice dresses now and dont hide in baggy clothes, surely thats good enough?
So I now have 4 pound to target and start my week on plan, back to basics trying new food and actually looking forward to the meals! I am hoping to be at ‘target’ for xmas although I have been at it pretty much all year! I have also joined the gym so just want to take a step back from the scales and concentrate on getting fit again, the last thing I need is to be gaining muscle and gaining weight and feeling shit about it.
In other news my boy turned two today!!!! 2!!! Oh my word where did time go? I relived the whole labour again this year and I am pretty much healed now, I had a section and its changed my body for life, it has made me not want more children but without it I wouldnt have my son Brogan. I still get annoyed by the ‘easy c section’ comments but people will never know until they have lived it will they?
So Brogan is 2, he is such a happy smiley boy with a wicked sense of humour, a big hug for everyone and if your really lucky a big sloppy kiss! He loves twirlywoos, teletubbies and teddies….. and walking in daddies slippers. His fave meal is spag bol with milkshake and his favourite person other than us is Auntie Mands….
So I turned 30 this year, didn’t have no meltdowns!
I was just really happy to think of everything I have achieved in my 30 years on this planet…
Husband, son, dog, love, career, good friends, 3 houses and a car….
I celebrated with my sister in Leeds, my friend Amanda at a spa night and with all my friends and family at my first ever surprise party! I much preferred turning 30 than 20 for sure!!
And one of the best presents was getting to celebrate my birthday at work (got spoilt rotten btw!) with my oldest best friend!
I have a little list in my head of achievements for the next 10 years now let’s hope I manage them!
So this year really has passed me by and I have done so much just not had the chance to sit and think about it all and write it down…
I’ve been married 5 years!!!
We went to Scotland on holiday this year and this was timed nicely with a trip down memory lane at Gretna Green!
So this year we stayed near Loch Lomond on a Parkdean holiday site In a lodge, the accommodation was 5* And the site was beautiful! Dog friendly and there was a kids club with bar and restaurant on site which is handy now we have a toddler!
Swimming was at 9, kids club at 10 and disco at 6. Brogan loved it!
We visited Oban, Ben Nevis on a cable car and Fortwilliam, Killin, Bridge of Orchy and a few other little villages I can’t remember.
The only downside to the holiday was the long drive! You really are in the middle of nowhere but the views !!!
We are now looking at possibly a Parkdean near Cornwall for next year….
So I have spent this year on and off plan but have thoroughly enjoyed myself! I weigh the same as I did this time last year. I started off feeling upset I hadn’t made any progress but have more recently been questioning myself… I was nearly 15st and I have maintained 12st for a year now and maybe that IS progress?
I have 1/2-1 stone to lose and my positive thoughts are telling me this is my best time of year to lose weight with all the hearty healthy Sunday roasts, chillis and stews!
I have started keep fit once a week and Zumba once a week, I’m hoping with this and trying 2 SP days a week and planning 1 naughty meal a week I might actually get to target before Xmas… If I don’t I think I might just stay as I am, I doubt as a woman we ever feel truly happy anyway and they are just numbers!
What an amazing holiday! We stayed in Manchester for the night in a hotel and I really thought Brogan wouldn’t sleep but he did all night long like a trooper!
We woke him up to go to the airport and he was so well behaved to say we woke him at 5am! There was a lovely restaurant in the airport where we all ate brekkie then we went to a child section where he could play freely while we watched the planes! We didn’t go in the priority boarding section, I think 2 hours is a long enough flight without another 30 mins waiting! We had the pram literally till we were on the runway and it was the first thing we got when we landed in Spain!
It was lovely and warm when we landed and it was nice and familiar, I love Girona airport there are so many memories in that airport of seeing my dad for the first time in months! We got a private taxi to Cala Gogo it was all on a dual carriageway and was about 40 mins I am super glad we did that over a coach transfer it was worth the extra money for sure!
By the time we checked into our chalet it was late afternoon so we quickly went for pizza at the onsite restaurant then put brogan to bed while we chilled with wine and snacks.
The holiday was packed with exploring, walking, swimming, sunshine, sand and lots of food and drink 🙂
I didn’t sleep well as I was poorly but other than that the holiday was just amazing and a top first family holiday abroad!
I am already planning next years holiday abroad 😁
The progress has been really slow but I truly believe I am more likely to maintain this way, I am still having a life and do not feel deprived in the slightest! I now have 4lb to target although the last week I have been totally off plan, its been amazing! I ate everything i fancied and had lots of fun.. Put 3lb on but managed to get it off again after a few days back on plan so now I am back to a maintain since I was last at group.
I have one more weigh in before my holiday and hope to go out with a bang! I am pretty sure the damage will be high and for once I do not care! The holiday will be amazing, I will enjoy it 100% and I know I will get back on it when i land back in the UK.
I think sometimes I still think I am the size 20 girl when i Look in the mirror… Still nearly 15 stone and it takes for me to see my comparison pics to remember where I started and why I started and how far I have come. A few bad meals, a few bad weeks will not see me back at square one… I will never go back there, I am too happy now!
I have taken up walking again and I forgot how much I loved it, I feel so good when I am walking and have so much more energy afterwards! I am so glad the good weather is on its way so i can keep it up! I have done 7 miles this weekend I am hoping this will see my last week of weight loss is a good one….